27 June, 2004 - 18:35

Why didn't I?

There are so many of those.

If I knew from the moment that I began to develop signs, why didn't I seek Post Exposure Prophelaxis?

If I knew.

My parents were in town, I'll blame it on them.

If I knew, I would have reacted.

And this is my problem: I often have the knowledge, but lack the motivation to go and actually act on it.

This time it's serious enough to kill me.

And I didn't act.

I didn't budge.

Because my parents were in town.

I didn't move.

Because I wasn't sure.

I wasn't sure, even though I knew enough.

I was sure enought to know what to do.

I knew what to do.

But I don't know what to do now.